Question for Betty.

I'm currently living with my boyfriend and a roommate. My boy friend and I are both in our early 20's and our roommate is in his late 20's.  The thing is we are both very quiet and private people and our roommate is mad at us becuase we don't hang out with him all the time, especially me.  I tend to hide away when confronted like he has confronted me.  He works in a treatment center so he treats me like one of the kids he works with.  I have talked with him and it seemed like things got better cause he understood.  Now, he things are  getting  bad again.  I don't know what to day anymore.  I'm getting so stressed out it is making it so hard to do school work.  To top it all off, now my parents are saying its my fault.  What should I do?

Betty's Answer.

Thanks for writing.  You have great questions.  First of all I hear you say this is an uncomfortable situation for you.  It is really tough to have this going on in your own home.  Your feelings are valid, you are a private person, and need to have that privacy in your home.  You do not have to be best friends with roommates. Boundaries are important as well as limit setting.  Others may give their opinions (like your parents), take it or leave it.  It is your choice. Communications should be clear, concise and direct with this roommate.  You may want to discuss dealing with these issues and added stress with a Mental Health Provider.

If you are an eligible UAA student, you may call the Student Health & Counseling Center to set up an intake appointment with one of the Mental Health Providers.  You may also refer to our website for further on-campus counseling options.